There's always something to break the peace

And it usually comes in the form of a phone call from a teenager who knows you're at home for the day instead of at work.

Somehow she miraculously manages to break a bone/come down with the worst bout of stomach bug ever/ bang her head/ whatever it may be that would require a phone call to me to make sure I'm not enjoying my time alone at home and that I have to leave the house like right now.

I had the day off today. Not because I wanted to but because there was just nothing to do at work. While I sighed heavily about the loss of a days pay I was secretly pleased because it meant I could have some alone time. Henry would be at daycare, Ben would be at work and Maya would be at school.

I walked my adorable children to their respective drop off zones this morning and walked home feeling somewhat excited about ALL THAT TIME ALONE! Because I was also feeling a little domesticated I came home and cleaned...for a bit anyway.I also shopped for food despite promising that I never would again. I wouldn't go as far as to say it was a pleasurable experience but it was at least without panic. I was able to get in there, fill the trolley and get out in under twenty minutes. I didn't have a toddler to save from the traffic in the carpark or to stop filling the trolley with novelty truck shaped biscuit tins. There was no teenager asking me to buy mascara's and 45 different varieties of chocolate drinks and expensive hair shampoos. I got it home and packed without the toddler and the teenager opening everything before I'd even had a chance to get it out of the car. Sounds like heaven doesn't it.

I washed several piles of dirty clothes, vacuumed the floors and the car and prepared dinner. It's amazing how easy those simple things are when there's no one else to distract you. I even drank a whole hot cup of tea, ate several pieces of chocolate and talked the council guys into feeding some of our tree trimmings into their mulching machine. I think they were disappointed I didn't have more. I almost told them to go right ahead and just cut down all the overgrown trees in our yard and mulch them to a bloody pulp.

I looked up at the clock just after 1PM and knew the countdown had begun. There were only two short hours of peace left in which I could start to read the hundreds of gossip magazines that were left on my back porch by my elderly neighbour over a week ago.

Just as I flipped to the page that would tell me all about how to avoid developing an eating disorder but still be as thin as Lindsay Lohan the phone rang.

"Mum, it's me, I broke my fingers, can you come and get me or should I get the bus?"

"Get the bus, nothing you can do for a broken finger anyway. I'm about to kick start my new diet which includes lots of rest and perhaps some illegal drugs so if you don't mind I'll see you when you get home"

"Ok, well I'll just hobble home, drag my really heavy bag behind me. The girls at school say you can die from a broken finger. They read about a girl in a magazine who once broke her finger and died three days later".

"Really? Her mum must be really mean. Maybe she didn't take her to the hospital in time. Maybe she didn't even bother picking her up from school and made her catch the bus home".

We didn't really have that exact conversation and I may be the meanest mother on the planet but since she was laughing while talking to me and the last time she supposedly had a broken finger it turned out it was just a little bruised. She didn't complain too loudly about catching the bus and I promised to meet her at the bus stop with the car but I didn't want to cut into my OWN TIME because I had eating disorders to learn about.